The Birthday party
by Nenya93
Summary: Voldemort discovers it's Quirrell's birthday, and is trying to make it "the best birthday anyone has ever seen!". But things don't always go as planned. Inspired by "A Very Potter Musical". Not slash.
1. The Day Before

**The Day Before**

"Oh Quirrell! Isn't today just a wonderful day?" The evil Dark Lord was apparently in a good mood today, dancing around in the small living room.

"Yes my Voldemort, it sure is". Quirrell wasn't really paying attention. He had been awfully busy lately, with all the paper work having an evil parasite living in your house involved.

"Don't you know what day it is today Quirrell?" Voldemort sat down and grinned.

"Uhm, Thursday?" Quirrell never even lifted his eyes from his papers.

Voldemort sighed. "Well, duh! But not that day! I'll tell you what day it is! It's the day before your birthday!"

Quirrell frowned. "No it isn't! It can't be… Wait, what date is it today?"

"The seventh!"

"Of _May_?"

"Yup!"

"Woah… Oh well, it doesn't matter" Quirrell went back to his work.

"Quirrell! My man! You deserve to have a day of FUN! After all, you did spend many months in Azkaban! And since that was, kind of, my bad, I'm going to organize the best damn birthday anybody has ever seen!"

"Well, when you put it that way… fine… It'll be…. Fun…"


	2. Before Breakfast and Breakfast

**Before Breakfast and Breakfast **

"Good morning you, how are all your evil birthday plans coming along?"

Voldemort's head suddenly popped up from beneath the covers looking disoriented. "What? What time is it? Are you awake already?"

"No, I'm just sleepwalking", Quirrell rolled his eyes. "It's almost 11am, I've been up for hours, but I figured you needed the sleep."

"What? That can't be! I was going to surprise you with breakfast in bed… Go back to bed!"

Quirrell rolled his eyes again, "Yeah, right. Get up and get dressed, I've made pancakes!"

Voldemort's eyes became wide open, "You did WHAT?! Gee Quirrell! You're ruining my plans! Go back to bed! Right now!"

"Can't you just accept the defeat and eat your pancakes?"

"_Nevah_! I'm the Dark Lord! I'm never defeated!"

Quirrell coughed loudly.

"Oh shut up!" Voldemort hissed and gave his friend the stare of evil before continuing: "As I was saying, I _am_ the Dark Lord… And… I command you! To _go back to bed!"_

Quirrell rolled his eyes again, "That was all you have planned? Breakfast at bed?"

Voldemort made an insulted face: "Of course not! We are going rollerblading!"

For the first time that day, Quirrell showed an interest: "Really? We are finally going rollerblading?"

******

"Oh! And I have a gift for you!" Voldemort managed to say between pancakes.

Quirrell lifted his eyebrows, "Really? What kind of gift?"

"You might say it's a… boss gift…" Voldemort grinned.

Quirrell sighed. "Is it a Zefron poster?"

"Uhm, maybe… "

Quirrell sighed… again…"Voldie, you know I like Robert Pattinson better!"

Voldemort became huffy. "I know that, I'm just in denial, we both know Pattinson is an ugly wannabe-Zefron!" he hissed

"Well I think he was swell in that Twilight-movie!" Quirrell said hardheadedly.

"Oh grow up!" Voldemort hissed, "I might just have seen the first half of it, but we both know that movie sucks! And Pattinson can't act! Not like Zefron. He is great. And handsome. And a great singer. Pattinson is just gay. Everybody knows vampires don't sparkle! That's ridicules! Not like HSM, everybody knows muggle-teens randomly burst into song all the time. That movie had personality!"

"Whatever, I'm not going to argue with you. You're just gonna end up using the Cruciatus Curse on me…. Again!"

"That only happened once… and you deserved it! How dare you say Hanna Montana is a stupid show?!" Voldemort was hissing again.

"I was just saying that it is stupid that just because she wears a wig, nobody recognizes her!"

"You had _no right_!" the hissing had now turned into a snare, and Voldemort suddenly had his hand is his pocket. Quirrell had noticed too.

"Whatever, let's just agree to disagree and go rollerblading!"

"Yes, let us not argue about it anymore. It's moot anyway, we both know I'm right!"

Quirrell sighed for the hundredth time but didn't argue further.

"Are we going rollerblading today or not?"

"We are! And after on… I have another surprise for you!" Voldemort grinned, not evilly this time, just… evil-ish.

Quirrell sighed _and_ rolled his eyes "If it's a Zefron-movie I might never forgive you… Just saying"

Voldemort frowned, Quirrell noticed and put up an "I-don't-believe-it"-look. "It's not, is it?"

Voldemort smiled innocently, "Not anymore! But you'll see! Now let's go!"


End file.
